Perseverance
by Arianna-rules
Summary: Based on spoilers for upcoming episode "Infamous". Clark picks up Lois at the airport. ONE SHOT.


**Perseverance **

As Lois walked into the arrival lounge at the Metropolis Airport, her heart filled with the same feeling of uneasiness that she felt last night when Clark told her that he will pick her up at the airport. It was the first time they had talked after she had left for Star City about a month and a half ago. Although Clark had called her numerous times during this period but she never picked up the phone because she found it impossible to be able to control the flood of emotions that she knew would storm her heart if she listened to his voice again.

The long hours, that she had spent sitting by Jimmy's bedside at the Star City General Hospital in the past six weeks, had given her ample time to evaluate her current situation. Her thinking abilities and rationale that had abandoned her on Chloe's wedding night slowly began to come back. Along with that, her fighting instincts also returned and she was no longer as defenseless as she had been that night. She was no longer vulnerable to the pain and heartbreak that her feelings for Clark had caused her. She was herself again. She was Lois Lane again.

Deep inside, she knew that she would never be able to get over her feelings for Clark ever, because she had never loved anyone so deeply and madly before. She knew it will slowly destroy her from inside, but on the outside, she was still Lois Lane, she would not budge or shatter no matter what happened. She simply won't let Clark or anyone else notice how hurt and heartbroken she was.

The way Clark had looked away from her that night when Lana entered the party and the way he later sat by her in the hospital had made it evident to Lois that he would never be able to get over Lana. He would never be able to love her the way she loved him and Lois could never settle for that. Knowing that the man she loved with all her heart and soul could never fully invest himself in their relationship because he was unable to get over his ex-girlfriend was not acceptable to Lois. She would not settle for being the "second best" no matter how much she loved him. She would have either all of him or none of him, and that was not something she could see happening.

Even though Chloe had told her a week ago, that Lana had left Clark once again but that did not raise her hopes even by a notch. By now, she had learned very well that Clark and Lana would continue with this back and forth for the rest of their lives and it was not possible for her to have any kind of relationship with him.

Therefore, the best way out for her was that she would act in front of him as if nothing had changed between them. She would bury herself in her work and would dedicate her life to the one thing she loved probably as much as she loved Clark – journalism.

The past few weeks had been straight out of hell for her but once she made that resolve, she felt a new strength inside her. All the dejection that she had felt over the weeks disappeared and her mind filled with a new determination to get back to her life. She knew it would be difficult to face him again and even more difficult to sit across the desk with him every day but still, she would not let her feelings for him overcome her life.

_That resolve _was perhaps what gave her the strength to be able to talk to Clark again, without stirring up any emotions. Her voice was so calm that it felt as if she had only left him yesterday and as if she never felt a thing for him.

"_Lois, I have been trying to talk to you for ages, why weren't you picking up my calls?" he sounded surprised, hurt and annoyed all at the same time._

"_I was busy. Jimmy needed attention 24/7 and with Chloe not on her husband's side, it became kinda difficult," she replied._

_There was silence._

"_Chloe… was stuck with some stuff here," he replied hesitantly._

"_Yeah, she told me that Lana was in some kind of trouble. Must have been something really important that Chloe even had to leave Jimmy dying here," she failed to hide the sarcasm in her voice._

_She still found it impossible to believe that after being rescued from that monster that took her, Chloe visited Jimmy in the hospital only once and after that, she just left for Metropolis and never returned. Suddenly, she realized that no matter how unhappy she was with Chloe's behavior with Jimmy lately, it was not something she should be discussing with Clark_

"_So how are things at your end?" she asked in a nonchalant tone, changing the subject._

"_A lot has happened Lois," Clark admitted._

_For some reason, Lois felt that his voice was quivering a bit when he said that._

_There was silence._

"_We need to talk… about a lot of things," he added after some time._

"_Yeah, I have a lot of catching up to do with my articles, I am sure you'll give me a heads up on what's going on," she replied, changing lanes._

_She knew very well what he was referring to and it was something she had to avoid on all costs._

"_Yeah I definitely will Lois," he replied._

_She did not know what he meant by that but way he said it made it quite evident that he was not merely referring to work._

"_Thanks," was all she could say._

"_How's Jimmy?" he asked._

"_He's recovering," she replied, "They are shifting him back to Metropolis General in a couple of days,"_

"_Yeah, Chloe told me. Jimmy went through a lot, I am glad to know he's okay," he said._

"_Yeah me too," she replied._

_There was silence again._

"_Chloe told me you are coming back tomorrow?" he asked in an unsure tone._

_Damn. That was not something she wanted him to know._

"_Yup," she said._

"_What time is your flight?" he asked._

"_Uh… 8:30 a.m.," she replied._

"_So you'll be here by 10:45 a.m. right? I'll pick you up at the airport," he quickly replied._

"_No… Clark… you really do not need to. I'll grab a Taxi," she replied, emphasizing hard on the words "not need to"._

_She hated where this was leading. _

"_No you won't. I am picking you up," he snapped._

_Lois was startled for a moment. Clark probably realized that._

"_Uh… I mean that I… let me pick you up at the airport Lois," he said in a much softer tone this time._

_She almost felt that he was pleading. She did not know what to do because the last thing she wanted right now was to be in his company and listen to him talk about Lana and taking the blame for all of her miseries._

"_Clark, I need to go home and pick some stuff before I come back to work so…" she tried to come up with an excuse._

"_That's fine; I have to do some interviews for an assignment so I have an excuse to get out. We'll go back to Smallville, get the stuff you want and come back," there was desperation and determination in his voice all at the same time._

_He simply was not in a mood to let her talk her way out of his offer._

"_I will be waiting for you outside the airport," he quickly added, not leaving any room for her to refuse._

"_Okay," she conceded in a resigned tone._

_She told herself immediately that it was only because she was too tired to argue._

"_See you tomorrow Lois," _

"_See you," she sighed and ended the call._

Once again, her resolve weakened. She could feel the hope and longing in his voice. It was evident to her that he was eager to see her again and talk to her about many things and it was not long after Lana had left him. Didn't it mean that he wanted to be with her despite of seeing and meeting Lana once again? Didn't that suggest that things had changed? Didn't it mean that Clark was aware that there was something going on between them before Lana came back?

She quickly shook herself out of the labyrinth that she was once again being pulled into after talking to him.

"_I am going back to Metropolis but I am not going back to this madness again, I won't let him hurt me again," _She told herself firmly and strictly.

Once again, the walls that she had built around her to protect herself from Clark became strong and intact.

Lois looked at her watch as she walked out of the airport. It was 11:00 a.m. and there was no sign of Clark anywhere. After looking around for some time, she dropped her suitcase on the ground and let out a loud sigh of frustration.

Clark was not really known well for his timekeeping but this was the worst time in the world to piss her off with his tardiness. She was tired and upset. She had little sleep last night because Jimmy had suddenly caught a high fever. In his delirium, he kept calling Chloe's name and Lois had to keep telling him that she would be there soon. Knowing that it was a lie, Lois felt ashamed as well as angry.

Around 7:30 a.m. in the morning, when Jimmy finally started getting better, Lois rushed back to her hotel and took a shower, quickly changed into a pair of black dress pants and a purple blouse she had bought last week and hurried towards the airport.

Oliver had tried his best to convince Lois to take his private jet but she had refused. She did not need to take any favors from her ex-boyfriend. Oliver may assert all he wanted that they were still very good friends and she valued that very much, but to use his jet to travel or to stay in the presidential suite of the five star hotel he owned without paying a single penny was simply not acceptable to her by any means.

She looked at her watch again. It was 11:15 a.m. She started pacing.

"_It figures I am not very high on his list of priorities am I?"_

She was exhausted and bitter. To make matters worse, the taste of the horrible coffee she had on the flight still lingered in her mouth the only things she needed right now were a nice latte and a comfortable drive home.

"Is it too much to ask for?" she mumbled.

Every minute that passed made her more annoyed with Clark.

"_That's it, I am leaving, I am not going to stand here looking like a fool,"_

She turned around in search of a cab before the thought of Clark running into some sort of trouble crossed her mind. She may think that she hated him at this moment but the mere thought of his being in some predicament was enough to fill her mind with all kinds of apprehensions and worries.

"_I should call him before I leave," _she thought.

She took out her cell phone but before she dialed his number, she spotted him walking towards her.

All the anger, annoyance and disappointment she felt minutes ago evaporated in thin air as her eyes caught his sight. He was wearing a crisp, white dress shirt and dark grey slacks. Her heartbeat rose as he approached her. Once again, she started to feel all the emotions she had experienced when she left him six weeks ago. She felt that her strength and determination was once again abandoning her. She simply stood in awe, watching him like a giddy schoolgirl who has suddenly spotted her favorite rock star.

She realized that being around him would be more difficult than she thought. The moment she saw him, her feelings for him huddled in her heart and crippled her thinking abilities, just like his huge and towering form had suddenly overshadowed her and made her look petite in comparison.

Another tide of emotion suddenly carried her into an entirely different direction as she remembered how her heart was shattered into pieces before she left. She remembered what happened after Lana's return and felt as if an unseen wall stood between them.

"_Pull yourself together Lois,"_

She chastised herself.

"Hey, how are you?" his voice was hoarse and full of emotions.

She felt that she would melt as she caught the smoldering look in his eyes. He looked at her so ardently that it sent a shiver down her spine. Before she could gather herself and reply, his arms were around her, pulling her into a tight hug. He held her so firmly in his arms that she could not even put her hands around him and hug him back. She simply stood where she was. All her senses abandoned her then, the only feeling left was the love she had for him, the desire she felt on being touched by him. The sudden sensation made her blood pump in her veins. The only thing she was able to hear was her own erratic heartbeat.

"I have missed you Lois," he whispered, "I have really missed you,"

When she did not reply for a long time, he probably must have realized that he was choking her and immediately let go.

"How are you?" he asked again and then assailed her with his concerns, "You must be really tired… but you don't look tired… you look great Lois,"

He was eager to know how she was doing but not allowing her to talk. Clark Kent was definitely not in control of his words and emotions.

Suddenly she noticed that he was wearing the same tie she had gifted him on his birthday. She did not know whether it was a coincidence or he did that on purpose. One thing was sure, he had missed her and he had longed for her company. She was unable to understand whether it meant that he wanted to start where they left or was it only a welcome given by her best friend but either way, she wasn't going to involve herself into something that she knew would end badly. She did not have enough strength to suffer another heartbreak and loose her friendship with Clark forever.

"Where were you? I thought you forgot that you had to pick me up?" she finally asked in an irritated tone.

Clark's expressions on hearing that were a mix of embarrassment as well as some sort of relief and excitement all at the same time. It was as if he was happy to see her talking to him again even if she was royally pissed at him.

"What took you so long?" she asked again.

"I… I uh… the tractor broke," he blurted out without thinking.

Lois merely glared at him and he silently looked at her with an expression on his face that read, "_I know I am in trouble right"._

"God, Smallville can't you come up with a better excuse," she rolled her eyes.

He was embarrassed now.

"You could just say that you didn't make it on time because you didn't care enough to remember," she accused.

"That's not true," his disagreement was vehement.

"Then where were you?" she asked.

"I… uh… I got…" he started to blabber again.

"Fine, whatever," she let him off the hook because she was in no mood to start a battle right now that would surely give her a migraine.

As she started walking towards the parking area, he picked up her luggage and followed her with his head ducked.

"I am sorry," he said from behind.

Lois suddenly stopped and turned around on her heels. He literally had to come to a skidding stop in order to prevent himself from running into her.

"Clark do you know that I didn't sleep last night because Jimmy had high fever and then I had to rush to the airport this morning and that the flight attendant was really rude and the coffee was terrible?" she asked.

"Lois… I…"

He stopped when he realized that it was a rhetorical question.

"No. You didn't know. And the last thing I wanted right now was to stand here looking like an idiot because your tractor broke," the pitch of her voice got higher and higher.

Clark was surprised and overwhelmed by her sudden outburst. She was the complete opposite of the Lois he had seen in the recent weeks. Right now, she sounded pretty much like the spoiled brat Lois that stormed into his life five years ago.

"I am sorry Lois, I really am," he implored.

Lois paused for a moment and looked at him. He looked so sincere and honest. How could he make her feel so weak and vulnerable? How could he make her so crazy that she lost all her senses the moment she saw him again? She needed more strength to be around him or else she would just break apart in front of him. She suddenly felt a strong need to reiterate the resolve that had weakened the moment she had seen him again.

"I am sorry for everything Lois," he whispered.

She silently watched him as he put down her suitcase and took a step closer to her, taking her hand in his. She wanted to step back and pull her hand away but was unable to do so. It was as if she had lost all her strength.

"There is a lot we have to talk about Lois, I've done a lot of thinking in the past couple of weeks," he said.

As he entangled his fingers with hers and rubbed her palm gently with his thumb, she felt that she would loose all her senses if he won't stop doing that soon. She hated herself for not being able to muster the strength to pull her hand out of his grip. She also hated the fact that she felt it impossible to think straight with his hand touching hers like that.

"Thinking about what?" she finally asked.

For a moment, she was glad that she was able to form a coherent sentence because the storm of emotions that was building up inside her right now had left her with little sense of what was going on around her.

"About us," he replied.

"What about us Clark?" she asked, sounding completely oblivious.

"Lois… what happened between us that night at Chloe's wedding, or what would have happened," he tried to remind her.

His tone suddenly filled with hesitation and fear as he slowly freed her hand. Lois did not let her expression change a bit. A storm was building up inside her but her face was so calm as if she did not have a clue what Clark was talking about.

"Lois, we can't leave it there, whatever that was between us…," he added.

It sounded more like a question than a statement.

"There _was _nothing between _us _Clark," she replied, feeling as if some unseen claws had clutched her heart.

"Lois… you can't deny that… what happened… what was about to happen that night," he said.

He tried to grab Lois's hand once again, but she stepped back and stopped him.

"Clark, it was Chloe's wedding, we were happy and danced and got a little carried away, that's all. Let's stop it there and try not to make anything else out of it," her tone was dismissive and expressionless.

They stood silently for a moment. Clark looked disappointed as he looked away from Lois. Lois did not know whether to congratulate herself on her achievement or just scream at the pain, the loss, the loneliness and the heartache that she was suffering from right now.

"Can we leave now? I am already way behind my schedule," she finally managed to say after some time.

"Sure," he replied with a sigh, "Behind you,"

She turned around without saying anything and started walking. He followed her to his truck that he had parked across the road.

"I need some caffeine in my system and fast," she said as soon as the vehicle drove off.

"There's a coffee place around the corner, do you want to stop or should we get you home first?" he asked.

"Um… coffee first," she said, it wasn't a hard choice to make.

"Fine," he conceded as usual.

Lois knew it was the hardest thing in the world to do to build her defensive walls around Clark. She had just realized that she was madly in love with him. There was nothing that could stop her from feeling how she did for him. However, the one thing strong enough to prevent her from telling him how she felt was her self-respect. She would never be his second choice; she would never be the third wheel in his off and on relationship with Lana like her cousin had been for all those years. She would never put herself in the hands of fate again and live each day in the fear that someday his past will return and ruin everything they had. She will not settle for being his _backup plan_. She would continue to be his friend and would never let him know how she felt.

However, what Lois Lane did not know was that the man who sat next to her right now, the farm boy she had so desperately fallen in love with, was much more stubborn than she knew. She had no idea that he had finally realized that she was the woman with whom he wanted to spend the rest of his life. She was unaware that he knew very well that she was lying about not having any feelings for him and he knew that she loved him. She did not know that he was determined to win her back, with patience, with love, with friendship and understanding, just the way she wanted it and deserved it, even if it took them their whole lives, because he wasn't going anywhere, and he was not going to let her go anywhere either.

The one thing Lois Lane did not know that Clark Kent was more determined than she was and he was destined to win.

**END.**


End file.
